CHAPTER 11. LOVE COMES UNEXPECTEDLY

Having finished her practical biology lesson, she told her story:

“My thesis fell in the mid-2000s. I saw how prices for Russian raw materials were climbing. I set an ambitious task: to model world domination using a gas station. I chose a town where the number of households roughly matched the number of countries on the globe at that time. I aimed to gain access to municipal decision-making by purchasing the loyalty of key players.

I started by offering handsome men who visited the brothel a significant fuel discount at my gas station in exchange for good sex. They quickly realized they were winning double here: no need to shell out for either me or gasoline. Word spread to those who hadn’t strayed before but weren’t averse to saving on filling their cars.

Next came demands for tokens of attention from my admirers. Flowers, candy, alcohol, and even jewelry appeared. From the very best I demanded complete devotion—no sex on the side and unquestioning fulfillment of my requests.

Then came a wave of scandals about the moral character of those still visiting the brothel—completely depriving this indecent establishment of earnings. However, this wasn’t my doing, but my new friends’, who no longer used this vileness. They came exclusively to me and fought among themselves for the honor of staying with me overnight.

Ultimately, the most distinguished and influential began attending fashionable parties, including our congressman, who, like children, played games with us and fulfilled crazy desires, losing the boundary between game and domestic political life. Soon they became hostages of their indiscriminate behavior, and holding them firmly by the balls, I handed them over to the special services as the result of my thesis project. May God forgive me for corrupting these little ones.

I fear the local leader learned much from me. Now do you understand why I was sent to eliminate the consequences of my experiment? This is my punishment from God. It’s easy to corrupt a person, but not so easy to restore him.”

“Now I see why you want to provide medical aid in prisons. You want to lend a shoulder to those below whom no one exists in the social hierarchy? What about enlightening TV viewers, corrupted beyond measure by propaganda deployed since 2013 before the attack on Ukraine?” he decided to stir up debate.

“There are enough foreign-agent educators bringing universal human values alien to local traditional values to the masses. Just let them on screen and I won’t be needed there. Nemtsov spoke about this in his last public appearance. As for ‘beyond measure,’ I’d argue with you. There’s still room to go. By the way, are you vaccinated against COVID?” she steered the conversation in a trendy direction.

“Oh, I left my report card behind!” he joked.