Book 6 · Chapter 34

Call the Arrogant One to Account!

An excerpt from “The Secret of Putin’s Palace,” the sixth book in The Adventures of Putin’s Double.
‘So then we’re not agreed,’ she intoned the code phrase and collapsed to the floor.

The Empress

I viewed this palace as a fairground of vanity: hookah lounges, aqua-discos, bad taste in marble. But I held a secret trump: a smart security system no one knew about. I received the chief guest, traded compliments, summoned a correspondent for cheerful photos, then spoke the code phrase and lay down on the tiles. The system did the rest. Not a single shot was fired.

The Regional Leader (the “infantryman”)

I arrived with a thousand fighters and a report on the mosque, national projects, and the fight against COVID. I answered that I’m no padishah, that the guilty will be punished, that I’ll release that woman. I was told to go in her place to the Olympic opening in China and stab my own aide there. I reminded her of the pact between my father and her husband.

The “Golden Pistol” (his deputy)

It was I who called him padishah, and I who dreamed of his seat. To the empress’s question I answered evasively: “For the good of the people I’ll do anything. A Georgian once ruled Russia best. Tonight we take the country for ourselves.” It went badly.

The news spread: an important meeting, economic matters, a request for funding. The real picture is different: Russian and Georgian armies blockaded Chechnya, and the Belarus exercises abruptly changed character. For the defeated, the night of the great victory was cold and empty.

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